Do you ever hear someone that is so intent on showing how much they know (or think they know) that they can only talk about themselves and what is on their mind?
Or do you hear someone that is more concerned with being right than anything else?
How did you feel around those people? Did you enjoy the conversation? Was it helpful? Did you bond and feel it helped build a relationship?
More importantly, did you feel you were a valued part of the discussion or just a target?
Now the tough question… Ever been guilty of the above stated offenses?
I admit I have. As my wife says, I “have lots of words.” But I am working hard to be sure my words are relative to the other person, that I ask questions and really listen to the answers, that I learn from the discussion and that my words are meaningful. And I will continue to work on this.
It is one thing to talk and share useful information. That can be good. But it is another to talk over and through others and fail to listen. That is bad.
Here is an easy way to remember….
- Dialogue = Good
- Monologue = Not Good
Talking is okay. Just be self-aware of your conversation and constantly monitor it for value to all.
After all, if all your talking adds no value, interest, sales, or relationships then all your talking is like the farmer trying to teach the pig to sing…. it just wastes time and annoys the pig!
Glenn S. Phillips is the author of Nerd-to-English: Your Everyday Guide to Translating Your Business, Your Messages, and Yourself. His website, www.nerdtoenglish.com, will lead you to more information about effective communication training, risk assessments and genuinely helpful tips. You can email Glenn directly email@example.com.
© 2012 All Rights Reserved. Glenn S. Phillips and Forte’ Incorporated. (205) 985-1111